Ki's Birth Story

**Disclaimer: If you do not care to read the details of a natural birth, then stop reading. There are details you might not care to read.**

GT and I decided with the advice of our doctor to be induced by breaking my water. We decided this for a few reasons, my main one was that I was sick of waiting and planning each day as if it were the "day". This is really the first variation from having a "natural" birth. Anyway, so at my doctors appt on 5/19 we decided to induce on 5/21. I was already 5cm and 70-80% effaced.

We decided to use a different hospital this time to save money. We got to Longview Regional at 8:00. We registered at the front desk then went to our L&D room. I peed in a cup then put on the gown. The nurse came in and we answered a bunch of questions. She had spoken with my doctor so she knew kind of what my birth plan was. We talked about  intermediate external fetal monitoring (efm), having a saline lock, being mobile in between the efm, sitting on birth ball, etc... We came to a understanding of what she needed during the labor and I told her what I needed.

The doctor didnt show up until about 10:30. He broke my water and checked me. Still 5cm and between 70-80% and station was -2. The nurse put me on the efm for 20 minutes. Once that 20 minutes was up, I got up and walked around the room for 30 minutes.   Nothing really happened once my water was broken. I felt a little cramping but that was about it. I walked around the room alot. I sat on the toilet alot. And nothing.

The doc came in a little before 1 and told me we would need to start pitocin. At 1, the pitocin drip was started on a low level (6). I felt contractions right away. 30 minutes into the pitocin drip they got really intense. The nurse said I had to be on the EFM (strapped in the bed) the whole time I was on pitocin. She came in and I asked her to check me. I was at 6cm. I told her that I needed to pee. She took me off the efm. Once I got on the toilet my contractions were very very painful. At this point, I told GT I wanted an epidural. I told him I couldnt do it if I had to get back and lay in the hospital bed. BTW, the efm wasnt even picking up that I was having contractions!!! And the nurse wanted to up the amount I was getting!!!! GT told her no. Thank goodness! The nurse said to get an epidural I would have to get 2 bags of saline in my system before they could do that. (so really, I wouldnt have had time to get one, but I didnt know that at this point)

My doc came in and told me I really didnt want one. I told him I couldnt be strapped down to the bed and on pitocin drip without one. He said they could hook up the efm to me standing up and I laid across the bed on my birth ball. This whole time while contracting, I was moaning. Before I had this experience I would watch shows and think women were being weanies. Oh no, my friend. I couldnt control the sounds coming out of my mouth! It was so painful! Then I told them I really felt like I needed to go to the bathroom. Dr. didnt want me to because he thought I would deliver on the toilet. Well, I ribbed off all the monitors and went myself. The doctor told the nurse I went "radical". Haha. Then I got on the bed on all 4's. and thats when I felt the urge to push. The doc checked me and I will a 8. He said my cervix was really elastic so as I pushed it would widen.

I pushed for about 15 minutes in the beginning. It wasnt real serious. Just light pushes when I wanted. Then he checked me and all I had was a lip on my cervix left. Then the pushing got intense. It was so hard. I didnt think he would ever come out. I pushed about 25 minutes then decided I wasnt making any progress. I told the doc and nurse I needed a pep talk. They gave me one and my doc helped me find where to push. Once he did that, I pushed him out! His head came out first, and 30 seconds later came his shoulders. That was THE hardest part. It hurt more than anything I have ever felt.

So about 3 1/2 hours of labor he was out, I was exhausted. GT was elated! He even cried! :)  Everyone kept saying how big Ki looked, then the nursery nurse said 9lbs 3 oz. I was like WHAT??? I thought I was supposed to have a 7lb baby!!! I had a 2nd degree tear that I didnt feel. The doc gave me a local before he stitched me up. I got to feed Ki shortly after and he latched on!

We got to come home on Sunday evening. We had lots of company that night. Sunday night was rough on sleep because my milk wasnt in yet and little guy was hungry. My milk came in Monday night and that night was much, much better. Breast feeding is tough. I am so thrilled Ki has latched and we will make it through, I understand why more people do not do it. It really is tough, especially having another child who is a toddler. I am determined though!

The baby blues hit me today. We had a meeting with the lactation consultant. Then made a little target run while my parents were keeping Audrie. When we got home, they left. Audrie cried, I cried. And I couldnt stop crying. And really havent stopped. I know it will go away. All these crazy hormones and not as much sleep as normal! :)

End of Pregnancy List

The end of the pregnancy has not been fun. Here is the end of pregnancy list:

• I have gained 50 lbs. My face is fat. My legs are fat. My arms are fat. And of course my stomach...
• I have new stretch marks. This time on the top of my belly, with Audrie they were below my belly.
• I have like 3 shirts and 2 pairs of pants that fit.
• I pee every 10 minutes. No, really. And like every hour during the night.
• I have been waiting for my water to break for 3 weeks now. Or to go into labor. Neither have happened.
• Everyone is asking me why I am not in the hospital if I am 5 cm. The answer: I am not in labor.
• I am sooooooooo hungry. All the time. 
• I have back pain. So much that I had a knot in my back the other night from carrying around this large belly.
• I eat ice all day. GT has to stop and buy bags of it because our ice maker cant keep up.
• I think Audrie senses what is going on, she has not been easy to handle.
• My husband and I are not sleeping in the same room until Ki is born. We both have had weeks of sleepless nights due to my getting up to pee every hour and him snoring like a freight train. I do miss him but man, I have been sleeping better.
• I cant stop cleaning the kitchen. And of course smelling the cleaning products. Oh, and doing laundry. Its like I dont want one piece of dirty laundry in our house when we come home. Ha! 
• I watch Baby Story everyday. And Bringing Home Multiples. Sometimes A Baby Story makes me really mad and I have to turn it off. Every time I watch BHM, I think to myself, I can do this, I am only bringing home one! My heart goes out to the families. Whew.
• I am starting to feel a little nervous about how Audrie is going to adjust.

I know all of these negative things will fade the minute Ki is in my arms. I know the other things will work themselves out. I cant wait to kiss his face! I cant wait to see GT hold his little boy. I cant wait for Audrie to meet her baby brother we have been talking about for what seems like forever. I am so excited to have a baby again. Hopefully, this time I will cherish it even more knowing how quickly they turn into a toddler. Maybe next time I blog, these things will have happened! :)

Mother's Day and Painting!

For the past 2 weekends, Audrie has been visiting grandparents so GT and I can have some alone time before we are a family of 4!

The first weekend was Mother's Day. My family got together for a mother's day dinner. Here is a pic of me, my mom and my sweet niece Claire!

Me and my hunny. I am 37 wks 2 days in this pic.

For my mother's day gift, GT got me this cute necklace with Audrie and Ki on it.

Other than that I have been keeping myself busy (or trying to). I have been painting alot of canvases.

Now, I am working on Audrie's 2nd birthday party! I figured the more I get done before Ki is here, the better! :)

Potty Training...Sorta

We have entered into the world of going to the potty. We have had an attachment seat for a few months now. We put Audrie on it a few times probably around February to let her know this is your potty. The first time she peed on the potty was on March 27 with my mother-n-law. After that, it was a few weeks before she peed on the potty again. Every time we just happened to put her on the potty when she needed to go.

I had decided that I would wait until Ki was born to focus more on the whole potty training ordeal. Well, Audrie thought different. In the past 2-3 weeks, she has been asking to go to the potty alot. Many times though, she just wanted to sit on the potty and play. I am not one for patience in this area. I am like pee or get off the pot. Ha! So...I thought, we need a reward system. My child LOVES candy. Really anything sweet, just like her mama. I got some M&M's and put them in a clear bowl in the bathroom. It didnt take her long to learn that if she pee's in the potty, she gets a piece of candy. This has worked in getting her to go to the potty alot more and actually doing something when she is on the potty.

Frustrating things:

Wasting diapers. I have been really bad about not doing cloth diapers. Being so pregnant, I just dont have the energy. Anyway, I feel like we are wasting so many diapers by going to the potty all the time. If her diaper is dry, I will put on the same one, but I have a hard time putting one with pee back on, even if it is just one time.

There are still many times Audrie says she needs to potty and she doesnt actually potty. I dont think she quite has the sensation down yet. I think she tells me alot of times when she is peeing in her diaper or right after she pees in her diaper.

She cant do it herself. Our step-stool is not tall enough for her to get on and off the potty herself. Again, being 9 months preggo, this is no fun. I hope to get a taller one soon along with starting training panties/big girl panties, so she can do it more herself. She is a good wiper though! :) And I also plan on not being pregnant too much longer!

Audrie has not pooed on the toliet yet. Last weekend, she stayed with my mother-in-law and finished a poo in the toliet. I feel like we will have to "catch" her about to poo and show her that its FUN to poo on the toliet! HA!

Fun things:

She gets SOOOOOOO excited for herself and anyone else that pees on the toilet. It is really cute and funny!

I love watching her learn new things and becoming more independent.

The end of diapers for her is closer than it has been! :)

The PLAN:

I bought her Elmo potty DVD and a few potty books. Once Ki is here and things settle down a little, I am going to try hardcore. Fill her full of juice/milk, take her to the potty every 15-30 minutes, talk about the potty all day, watch the potty DVD all day/read the books...etc...

I feel like she really is ready, I just have to do the hard work for a few days. And if it doesnt work then thats ok. I just hate sitting on the fence at this point. If we are gonna potty, then we are gonna potty!

38 weeks!

Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along:38 Weeks

Size of baby: Im feeling like I am gonna have another 8 pounder.

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Around 50 lbs

Maternity Clothes: Yes. Some of my maternity clothes do not fit anymore :(

Gender: Boy. Hezekiah "Ki" Eugene. 

Movement: Still alot.

Sleep: Some nights good, some nights bad. Mostly bad at this point.

What I miss: sleeping through the night

Cravings: Ice, ice, ice! 

Symptoms: Most of them still. 

Best Moment this week:  My MIL kept Audrie for the weekend. GT and I went on a date and went to the movies, then for chocolate cake at Cheddars! :) Saturday we slept in, got donuts, worked on our flower bed (made it a rock bed) then went to eat with family for mother's day. It was a great, relaxing weekend. 

Things to Note: We had a doc appt on Thursday (exactly 38 weeks). I was 5cm and 80% effaced. The doc said Ki was still pretty high and at a -2 and was posterior. For some reason, I was thinking posterior was just another name for how high he was. Then I realized it means his head his facing the wrong way. He is supposed to be looking at my spine but instead he is looking at my belly button. From what I have read, this is super common and the baby almost always turns their head during labor. I have a feeling this might be why I am not going into labor. Because, seriously, I am 5 freakin cm. What is he waiting on????

My doctor has told me that if I make it until my next appt (Thursday May 19), he will intervene and induce me by breaking my water. At first, I thought this was something I would want him to do, but I have changed my mind. I know without starting labor on my own I am more likely to need pitocin. Getting pitocin leads to an epidural...and so on. The only way I might take him up on this is if I am dilated at a 7 or higher. I actually dont think he will let me dilate past a 7 without inducing me. I read last night that getting on all 4's and doing alot of pelvic rocking will help move the baby down and get him to turn his head, so I will be scrubbing the floors and baseboards today! :)

Follow-Up from my last post...

I feel like my last post needed a little clarification on a few things I said.

When I said I am worried about the hospital staff when giving birth is because they can really help or really hinder your birth experience. They have certain protocols they follow: internal/external monitoring, IV, not eating and drinking during labor, etc... I know I will be going against the grain. I had a WONDERFUL nurse when I was in labor with Audrie. I know I didnt have the natural experience, but she was great. My bestfriend, however, had a nurse that was not so helpful. After 13 hours of pitocin induced labor (with no pain medication), the doctor came in to find the nurse had her pitocin as high as it could go, allowing her to struggle to breath. She wouldnt help her go to the bathroom. And all sorts of other issues. The hospital I am giving birth at, and really Longview in general, is a little behind time. As my doctor explained to me, alot of the doctors in this area think they invented child birth and always do things by the text book.

Secondly, in the end of my post, I said, "They could care less about us as people, women and mothers. They want our money and to do as little work as possible to get it." The previous post came from watching the documentary "Pregnant in America" and from the email I got from the hospital. In the documentary, it talks about a group of doctors in practice together that have a 80% c-section rate! And how this one doctor told a woman her pelvis was too small to give birth so she would need a c-section. She then finds out he had a vacation scheduled the day after he wanted her to have c-section, she did end up giving birth vaginally with another doctor. There are many many more stories like this is in the documentary. Of course, I know not all doctors are like this.

I was told something in my Bradley method classes that really stuck with me and I think I have even said it on here before. The nurses, doctors, etc... will not remember my birth, but I will. Forever. And it is mine and my husbands job to be educated and advocate for our birth the way we want. Will it turn out exactly how we want it? It might not, but we know what we want in all circumstances. Even if I was using a midwife, GT and I are ultimately responsible for our birth. This goes for any couple or woman giving birth. Even if she knows she wants a c-section or epidural. She should still be able to make decisions about what she wants or doesnt want.

Lies from a Hospital

I have learned from my first birth experience not to talk to much about natural child birth. Alot of times it feels pointless. Sometimes like you are speaking a different language most people do not understand. This pregnancy, being a total different experience, we are going to do natural. We have a great doctor who is backing us up 100%, the only set back will be the hospital staff. I have been praying for our birth experience and the nurses we will have. I do not have an "I know it all attitude" because I certainly do not know it all.

What I do know is:

My pregnancy has been perfectly normal up to this point. Ki has been fine and I have been fine.
I do not need an I.V. for any reason known right now. My doc agrees with me and says I can have a saline lock where I can still be mobile and not hooked up to an IV pole.
I do not need internal heart monitoring.
I do not need a catheter.
I do not need any drugs...pitocin, cytotec, epidural, spinal tap, etc...
I do not need to be stuck in a bed.

I get these weekly emails from my hosptial, similar to the ones from baby center. Just an update on the baby and myself. You know the typical, average, whats going on in the development. Well, today, for my 38 week email, it says this:

News about epidurals

It has been thought in the past that epidurals given during labor may slow a fetus's heart rate. A recent study of nearly 500 women showed, however, that epidural analgesia does not have a negative effect on the baby's heart rate. The pain-relief medications commonly in use today do not cross the placenta.

I did have an epidural with Audrie. I really didnt have a decision in this, but if I did, I wouldnt say that I regretted it. I know my situation was different and had medical concern. Do I wonder all the time if all the drugs I was given during labor caused her not to latch on, therefore making breastfeeding almost impossible? Yes, I wonder this everyday. Do I wonder if she gets sick most then the average child because I couldnt breastfeed? Yes, I do. I know it is pointless, because nothing can be changed at this point, it is what is, but I cant help but wonder.

It is RIDICULOUS for anyone especially a hospital to say that pain-relief medicine does not cross the placenta. THAT IS A FLAT OUT LIE! It really has my blood boiling. This is the reason our c-section rate is SO high. The fear and lies that big hospital corporations and pharmaceutical companies tell women.

I am cautious to write this blog because I know all the controversy this topic causes. I know c-sections save lives. I agree. I know medicine saves lives. I agree. I know technology saves life. I agree. I want women to be educated. I want women to know they have a choice. I want women to not have fear of a natural process of life. And to realize this fear is mostly coming from people who just want our money. They could care less about us as people, women and mothers. They want our money and to do as little work as possible to get it.

Two documentaries I would highly recommend are "Pregnant in America" and "Business of Being Born". Both on netflix.

37 weeks!

Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along:37 Weeks

Size of baby: Im guessing around 6 lbs or 7 lbs?

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Around 50 lbs

Maternity Clothes: Yes. Some of my maternity clothes do not fit anymore :(

Gender: Boy. Hezekiah "Ki" Eugene. 

Movement: ALOT!

Sleep: Some nights good, some nights bad. 

What I miss: not being pregnant

Cravings: Ice, ice, ice! 

Symptoms: Most of them still. 

Best Moment this week:  This week was my first week home full-time. Audrie and I have had alot of ffun. I have been cleaning alot and staying busy to keep my mind off having Ki!

Things to Note: We had a doc appt on Wednesday (36 wks 6 days). I was 4 cm and 80% effaced. Doc said he would be surprised if I made it to next week without going into labor on my own. That night I started having irregular contractions at about 7pm. They continued until 11:30 when I went to sleep. They were like menstrual cramps. And very irregular in time apart and in intensity. At 2:30 am, I woke up and they were a little more intense. I tried counting them but they were too irregular. A few were quite painful and I thought for a time it was it...but it wasnt. Went back to sleep at 5:30 am and then they wre no more. Since then, I have continued having these contractions off and on throughout the day and night. Who knows what this all means. I have accepted the fact that it could be in hours, days, or weeks. I am trying to enjoy the little rest I get and spending time with Audrie. I am nervous but excited. I know our family will never be the same,  in a total good way. I am also hoping all these contractions are doing something dow there and my labor will be quick and easier to do natural! :)

The Anticipation

I have this crazy, cant wait to deliver anticipation that I didnt get to experience with Audrie. At this point in my last pregnancy, Audrie was here. I am now 36 weeks and 6 days. I totally understand now why so many women choose induction. It would feel so much relief to know the day Ki is coming. Even if it is past his due date, that would be fine, I just want to know when!

Last Tuesday, when I found out how far progressed I was, I kind of let my mind play tricks on me. I really thought in the next few days I would go into labor. Then I re-read parts of my Bradley method book and was reminded that it doesnt matter how effaced or dilated I am. He is going to come when he is ready to come. It could be days, could be weeks. It kind of helped me calm down and wanting him out so bad! I just cant wait to meet the little guy. And I am kind of ready to get it over with and start life as a family of 4. I know I will be regretting saying that at times.

I am trying to enjoy my time with just Audrie. We have been sleeping in! (until 8am!) Then eating bad things like powder sugar donuts for breakfast. We have been playing, playing, playing. Then napping together in the recliner. It has been so much fun, Audrie is so sweet. I cant wait to see her with her baby brother.

Today is my weekly doctors appt. I am looking forward to it. Have alot more questions to ask him. Only downside, we have to bring Audrie with us. And its right at 2, nap time. I keep going back and forth on if I want him to check me again. He might not give me a choice this time. And I find out if I have group B. I will update later! :)