Sunday, August 27, 2017

Farewell to Our Zoe Girl

I can remember it like yesterday. I had found an ad in the Longview News Journal- 6 week old Boston Terriers for sale. We met lady in Harleton at a gas station. She brought out a box of puppies. They were all male. We told her we only wanted a female. Her daughter got out of the truck with two females. I was instantly drawn to one. She licked my face and I was sold. And that's the day in June we got our Zoe.



She was covered in fleas. And later on, we came to believe she was actually in a puppy mill. We cleaned her up. Promised her a good life and just like that she joined our family of me, GT and Allie Bear. 





Then we added some kiddos. Zoe was so sensitive to them from day 1 and was always close by. 








She loved licking GT's toes. 


She loved the few times that it snowed



I would say most of all she loved her pal Allie. Allie was born deaf and when we got Zoe she became Allie's ears. The two were always together. Even sleeping on top of each other most of the time. 






If you ever came to our house, it's inevitable that you met Zoe. She would lick your face off. Making petting her irresistible. She loved people. She loved chewing up things especially in her early years. 

Another thing about Zoe is she could get out of any fence! No matter wood or metal. We often called her Houdini because of that. And ultimately what led us to have to say goodbye. 

She was 9 years old, and we had her all but 2 months of that. Audrie and Ki have only known life with her. Our hearts are broken and we miss her more then we ever imagined we would. As Ki prayed last night, "I hope Zoe rests in peace."  
I know some people think it's silly, but we trust God has a beginning and end for all creation, it was Zoe's time to go. We celebrate her fun personality and her overbearing need for kisses. Thankful for the 9 years we had with her! 

Friday, August 4, 2017

Powell's Birth Story! and a little more...

I always regretted not waiting for my body to go into labor on its own with Leslie. I was determined this time to wait for my body to go into labor and I wanted to do another birth without pain meds like I did with Ki. Mostly to save money because our insurance is ridiculous.

My pregnancy was completely healthy and similar to the other 3. Nauseous the first trimester. Awesome second trimester. Then the uncomfortable big as a house third trimester. But really the pregnancy was great. Heartburn and a back ache here and there was about the biggest things to complain about. And having to pee every 3 seconds.

I go to my 36 week appointment...The first cervical check. I am not dilated or effaced. And baby is still high. WHAT?!?!? This has never happened in the history of Lydia pregnancies. With Ki I was atleast 3cm by 36 weeks. I step up my cleaning game and clean all day, everyday! Thank you nesting!

37 week appointment. Same. No progress! My doctor was going to the beach and he wanted to me schedule an induction for the week he got back (39 weeks). I said no thanks, we will just see how far I am then and go from there. I get on my yoga ball alot more and keep cleaning, cleaning, cleaning.

38 weeks- Some progress!!! Whoop whoop! I was 2-3cm and I think 50%. I was told not to do anything to induce labor so my doctor would be back from vacation. Ha!

39 weeks- I was waiting to take my Silhouette picture the same weeks I was when I took one with Leslie. That was Sunday. The only difference I had been feeling was that I was soooooo tired in the afternoons for the past few days and more grumpy then usual. Now to Monday...Had a normal Monday. Helped mom with some insurance paperwork. Cleaned house for the millionth time. Cooked Kung Pao Chicken for dinner. After dinner GT went to put up chickens and found a snake in the chicken coop...


 This is the kind of excitement that happens at the Nehls home. Ha! We all gathered around the snake answering the kids million questions. Googling to find out what it was and if it was poisonous. I cant even remember now what it was but it wasn't poisonous.


Over the summer, Audrie and Leslie have really bonded. This was the last picture I took that Monday night. I remember thinking how grateful I was that Leslie loves Audrie so much and lets her carry her around and get her things. What a help it is to me!

And now for the fun part...I just dont want to forget the other things. Its so strange how one day you only have 3 kids and the next day you have 4! This has always been amazing to me with each kid.

So Monday night...I fix myself some Milton Crackers with homemade pimento cheese from Fairfield Market. I eat them while sitting on my yoga ball. I do 10 minutes of pelvic rolls ( I dont know what to call them) each way while watching the EIGHTIES documentary. I go to the bathroom about 10:45 and feel a ton of pressure. I go lay down in the bed to go to sleep and feel something kind of pop and water starts leaking. I jump out of bed quickly and tell GT "my water just broke!". He stays in bed while I go to the bathroom. I again tell him "My water just broke" and he asks me "How do you know?" Ummm..because I am leaking! lol! He didnt believe me! I call my mom. She asks me the same thing! ha! Then I call my friend Robin who was my person if I went into labor to come watch kiddos.

We had to switch all of our hospital bags/car seat from my van to GT's truck in case someone needed the van and all the car seats. Robin gets there around 11:30. My head was spinning. I didn't feel prepared to leave everyone even though they had bags packed. Robin said "we will be fine, just go have a baby!" So off we went to WK South... I called on the way to let them know I was coming. I tried to text everyone to arrange childcare for the next day but everyone was asleep!

I wasn't really gushing water or anything. My contractions were pretty sporadic and not really painful yet. Normally, I would have wanted to labor at home awhile but...1) We live 30 minutes away from the hospital-and being my fourth we had no idea how long it would be. 2) I tested positive for Group B Strep...and I knew I needed 2 bags of antibiotics so we wouldn't have to stay 2 nights.

Got admitted to the hospital pretty quickly. Was up in a labor room by 12:30 am. The nurse had to make sure my water had really broken before she could consider me in active labor. This was an hour long process with the lab. She also couldn't start my antibiotic until it was official I was in labor. She was a really sweet nurse but had to follow protocol. She checked me and I was 4cm and 80%.

I had forgotten my yoga ball at home so I asked GT to go buy one at Walmart. While he was gone, my nurse and the head nurse informed me that I couldn't use it because my water had broken. Basically, I was stuck in the bed to labor. They could get permission from my doctor to be mobile but it was the middle of the night and I still wasn't considered "in labor" until the lab confirmed it.

I would say at about 2am contractions were really picking up. They were closer together and getting pretty painful.  During each contraction I would picture my dad in Heaven with Jesus. The song "You're Beautiful" played over and over in my head. I am not sure why I didn't think to turn on worship music.

At 2:45 I called the nurse to come check me. I told GT if I was only 6cm, I was going to ask for an epidural. Sure enough I was 6cm and 100%. I failed to mention-when I was first getting situated the anesthesiologist came in about 12:30 and asked if I wanted an epidural because he was leaving for the night but he was on call. I declined at that time. So they had to wake him up to come get me an epidural. I do think if I had been able to walk around, get on my ball or even on all fours I could have pushed through. Nonetheless, He got there around 3:45 and had to read over my chart and blood work.

The epidural was very painful because I was contracting so hard and trying to be still. And he wasnt too happy we woke him up. Once its all said and done its about 4:15. The epidural wasnt working. It took a little bit of the edge off on the top of my uterus. But thats about it. I felt everything else. Felt my legs and my lower stomach and everything in between.

About 4:20, I asked the nurse to check me. I was 9cm with a cevical lip. This has been the case with 3 of my pregnancies so I told her I need to push and it will make me 10cm and take care of the lip. She asked me not to. Ha. I HAD to push. She calls my doctor to come in. For 30 minutes, I was having very painful contractions and wanted to push. The nurse told me to act like I was blowing out birthday candles and try not to push. This is next to impossible when your body is trying to get a baby out!

My doctor rolls in at like 5:05, trying to make conversation. GT says, "Lets save the pleasantries for after"...He barely gets on a gown, only gets 1 glove on all the way...He pulls out the stirrups, I throw my legs in them (because I can still feel everything) and push Powell out. It wasn't that easy and didn't feel that quick but I will spare the details. Mom will appreciate that. I did have some words come out of my mouth that I would never speak in front of my mother. I so wish we had it on video.

They put him on my chest...and just like with the others I was almost too exhausted to enjoy the moment. They let his cord pulsate a few minutes...something I was thankful for. I didnt tear so no need for stitches. I remember him crying so much when he came out. Leslie didnt do that...my first thought was we are going to have a fussy baby. I remember the nurse saying, "Wow, he's a big boy!" After a few minutes, I gave the ok for them to weigh him and do whatever else they do...




9lbs 1 oz...21 inches long
Powell Allen Nehls

In a lot of ways his birth was different then the others and some ways the same. We are over 3 weeks in and I still cant believe we have another baby most of the time. You know I like to be real- these 3 weeks have been really really hard.  And not just we have a newborn baby hard.  That will be a long blog for a different day and honestly still too real for me to go there. But each day is better and God is so faithful. Our community and family has blessed us by keep kids and bringing meals. And most importantly praying for us through this time. 

I cant finish this blog without mentioning my dad. I knew it was going to be hard having Powell without dad there or here. And it was sad. The hardest part is living everyday without being able to call or go visit. I can just picture him holding Powell and singing Jesus loves me. Tickling Leslie and laughing at her newest phrase she's learned. Hearing all about Audrie's birthday. Listening to Ki's wild stories. It hurts so much Pappy isn't here. I know all of the right things- He is in Heaven, we will see him again...but it really sucks. 

Here is Grammy and Audrie standing in the gap for Pappy

video









Sunday, June 25, 2017

37 weeks!


37 weeks!!!!

Pregnancy Highlights: 

Size of baby: I have no idea...Im scared to know

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Somewhere between 30-35lbs

Maternity Clothes: Yes

Gender: BOY! Powell Allen Nehls

Movement: If I am ranking all my kids in movement he is #3. It goes Ki, Leslie, Powell then Audrie. 

Sleep: Ive been having some vivid/crazy dreams but its been pretty good.

What I miss: Not being pregnant

Cravings: Smelling cleaning supplies and eating ice.

Symptoms:

Heartburn. Swelling. Nesting. Lack of patience. Out of breath. Eating all the things. 

Best Moments this week

    • Well we are 6 weeks into summer and my kids are going to their 4th VBS. lol
    • We went on vacation for 5 days!
    • Leslie is learning new words and phrases every day!
    • One week closer to meeting Powell!

NOT So Best Moment this week:

I am not sure if this is not so best....but went to the doc Friday and had my first "check". I was thinking I would be 2-3cm atleast... And nope. NOTHING! This is my first time in all three pregnancies to not be anything when checked! No dilation, no effacement. Cervix high. It really just shocked me. BUT I do want Powell to stay in a few more weeks so it really is a good thing too! 

Monday, June 5, 2017

34 weeks!



34 weeks!!!!

Pregnancy Highlights: 

Size of baby: I am guessing 5-6 pounds. My app says size of a cantaloupe...I dont buy that! 

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Ummmmm

Maternity Clothes: Yes

Gender: BOY! Powell Allen Nehls

Movement: He really has kind of decreased moving some. Not sure if its because of his growth, I used to feel real strong kicks and jabs at night. I still feel him often but its more just moving around.

Sleep: Pretty good minus peeing about 3-4 times during the night 

What I miss: Not being preganant

Cravings: Smelling cleaning supplies and eating ice.

Symptoms:

So I am not sure if this pregnancy related. A few weeks ago I got a little sinus infection. And it moved to my right ear. Ive had a zpack and a steriod shot and my ear IS STILL CLOGGED! Its driving me crazy. I have tried essential oils, sudafed, allergy meds, ACV/alcohol, garlic drops, peroxide, heating pad, etc... STILL CLOGGED.

Best Moments this week

    • We had a baby shower for Powell and it was so sweet. I really didnt think I would have one because it is our 4th...It was so fun to celebrate this little guy!
    • Not being on a schedule. Sleeping in some. Hanging out with friends....

NOT So Best Moment this week:

With the non-schedule, it is summer. With three kids and big and pregnant. Its not tooooooo bad but there have been some challenging days/moments. I am trying to enjoy them as much as I can! 

Thursday, May 11, 2017

30 weeks!!!


I usually wait until my hair is fixed,  make-up on, cute outfit, clean bathroom for a preggo selfie. Yesterday as I was picking up playing cards Leslie scattered around the bathroom floor (thank you older children for giving them to her), I glanced in the mirror. I thought "Oh my, I look rough", But then I thought, this is more real life then the belly pics I usually take. So here it is....Glasses because I had a migraine the night before, athletic clothes because I had been cleaning most of the day-including getting in the attic (ah!), sunburn from Ki's park field trip last week, messy/frizzy hair because I hadn't washed it in a few days from sick kids and a needy baby. And of course my beautiful roseaca because I havent worn make up since church on Sunday. 

So...here is my real life 30 week update!!!


30 weeks!!! 


Pregnancy Highlights: 

Size of baby: he was 3lbs 10oz at my 29 weeks appt

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  I think about 15-20. Closer to the 15 side, lol

Maternity Clothes: Yes

Gender: BOY! Powell Allen Nehls

Movement: He is definitely growing and moving!

Sleep: I got my sleep schedule off a few nights ago so that was rough but I am back on schedule. 

What I miss: Not being so hormonal

Cravings: Smelling cleaning supplies and eating ice.

Symptoms:

Heartburn. Being really emotional. Being tired alot (not sleepy, physical)

Best Moments this week

    • Went on two field trips- Sciport with AK and park with Ki
    • Leslie is getting to be miss sassy pants. Saying "No" and throwing fits. But she is also saying and doing some super cute things! My favorite is she says "thereyago"
    • I FINALLY got Leslies "new" crib finished. Hope to move it tonight and post some pictures soon. Now we can move her current crib to the boys room and I can start putting it together!
    • I guess since my last pregnancy update we had another sonogram of Powell! Its always fun to see a baby in your tummy! 

NOT So Best Moment this week:

Everything is slowly winding down, school only has a week left, only a few baseball games left...I am excited to have a slower pace. Sleeping in. Enjoying watching the big kids play with Leslie. But with that comes a good bit of fear and anxiousness. How am I going to juggle it all? How is another child going to fit into this family? Somedays/minutes I already feel spread so thin...how can I possibly care for another human, especially a baby one at that! I guess the closer it gets these fears and doubts creep in. I have to stop and pray and remember that the Giver of Life is who gives me life. I can't handle 4 kids. Gosh, I can't handle 3 or 2 or just 1 sometimes. BUT He can. He is always with me. His grace covers and abounds. 

Friday, May 5, 2017

Powell's 29 week sonogram!


Apparently, I stopped blogging at 29 weeks with Leslie. I distinctly remember thinking, "we aren't having any more kids so I won't want come back and read the details." Ha! 

I am not going to let this one slip by! I love reading the details years later! So here is what I got! 

  • Powell is already head down! And SUPER low. Which I already knew but gosh. Even the ultrasound tech was like wow he is low! 
  • The placenta is on the left of my uterus which I thought was strange because he favors my right side. Leslie favored my left. Go figure!
  • He is already measuring 3lbs 10 oz- so 32 weeks-3 weeks ahead. Which really isnt a surprise because we have decent size babies. HOWEVER!!!! I went back and read about Ki's 28 weeks sonogram and he was only 2lbs 14oz. You can read that here if you want. And he ended up being 9lbs 3oz at birth. Maybe the ultrasound was off. Or he will slow down growing. I have some of the cutest smocked outfits in Newborn. :( 
  • He isn't near as active as Ki was. He seems pretty chill except for he likes to move more at night of course. 
  • Blood pressure, blood sugar, fluid, etc... All looked good! 
  • Top pic is his profile. Middle is his boyhood (I needed to make sure it was a boy!) and the last he is facing out. Looks weird to me. 
  • It was sweet to see him. Everytime I have a sonogram it just gets more and more REAL! 

Monday, May 1, 2017

29 weeks!!! :)

(I thought this bump picture was appropriate. This is my life. Love these kiddos)

29 weeks!!! 
(Its been 9 weeks since I've updated :0 this pregnancy is flying by!)

Pregnancy Highlights: 

Size of baby: head of Cauliflower (around 2.5 pounds). We get to see him Wednesday at a sonogram! And I will know more how big he is! 

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  ugh. Thats all I have to say about that. lol.

Maternity Clothes: Yes. and I love them. Im still wearing some of my normal shorts!

Gender: BOY! Powell Allen Nehls

Movement: Yes! I feel hiccups usually twice a day! Plus the usual kicks and punches

Sleep: Pretty good! 

What I miss: Nothing really at this point. It is getting harder to do things like walk around, lol. But I know it wont last forever.

Cravings: Oh man. I love food. And I love it even more when I am pregnant. I was craving a Panera Bread Fiji Apple Salad. I had one last night and now I want another one! 

Symptoms:

Heartburn. Which has actually gotten better since my last update. 
Lots of leg cramps. Especially at night.
Lots of peeing. Again mostly at night.
My face/arms and hair are SOOOOOOOO dry. 

Best Moment this week
Short updates of the last 9 weeks! 
    • We sold our Longview house- WHOOP WHOOP
    • We finished soccer season! The big kids really enjoyed it but I am glad juggling two different teams/games/practices is over.
    • Ki is still playing baseball which he loves but he is a little distracted out on the field. ha. 
    • Making some progress on the nursery. Hope to get alot done this week and will make a separate post about that! 
    • God has been so good to us through these past few months. I see His hand everywhere loving and blessing our family.

NOT So Best Moment this week:

 I feel like the more time goes by, the more I miss dad. People say with time it gets easier, and maybe thats true but not yet. I hurts my heart so much that he doesn't get to see Leslie grow up. He loved her so much and loved watching her grow. We took a little trip to Dallas this past weekend and the whole time I kept thinking he would have enjoyed coming and playing with her. Every new word and development is so fun at this age and I hate he isn't here to share it.

Even harder to think about is that he won't be here for Powell's birth. He has been at every birth of my babies in the waiting room...praying for me, the baby, our health, the doctor and nurses... Then holding the baby for the first time he whispers Jesus into their ears with tears down his face, he sings "Jesus Loves Me" to them. I know his legacy lives on. And Powell has an amazing grammy and 2 awesome uncles that will fill in the gap but it still hurts.

I DO KNOW with joy that we will share tons of stories and pictures with Powell. He will know how special his Pappy was and even more so how much he loved the Lord and wanted that for all of his grandchildren. What a comfort it is to know that Powell will meet his Pappy one day in Heaven. I look forward to that day with hope and peace! 

Friday, March 10, 2017

Longview House Update and God's Kindness!

My precious friend painted this for me one Christmas. Such a special treasure to always remember our Longview house and the journey it has brought us on! 

I wasn't going to post this until we were in the "safe" zone. Or really until we closed on the house. Because we have been here before. And it didn't work out. Truth is...God was still good when that didn't work out. And He is still good now. He was good when my dad died. He was good when I had panic attacks. He was good in each of my kids births. HE IS GOOD! 

So let me give you a new timeline....Mid November 2016, we get a new renter. In the nick of time. He even asks if he can paint the inside of our house out of his pocket. Sure! :) 

Fast forward...middle of January...dad is in the hospital...I am trying to juggle GT being out of town, going up to the hospital, 3 kids...then one of neighbors from Longview texts me and ask if our renter moved out. OMG. Not again! Took a few days but we figured out yes he did move out. And left stuff in the house AGAIN! Stressed out isn't even appropriate to describe how I was feeling. 

Few weeks later, we load the kids up...go clean out the house for the second time. Clean the house. We have no idea how we are going to pay the mortgage but we know we just can't get renters again. We step out in little faith and put the house on the market.

God comes through and provides a tax refund we can use to pay a few months mortgage. Full honesty here, I was still pissed. I was angry that our renter moved out again. Angry we had this house we used to love and was such a blessing, but we were done with it. Angry that we had to spend our tax refund  on a mortgage to a house we weren't living in. I had so many other plans for that refund. My heart tried to be thankful God provided the money. I would go back and forth. Anger and thankfulness. All within the same minute.

We put the house on the market, January 31. It showed 3 times in the whole month. The last two times we listed it, it showed 3 times a week! We were so discouraged. 

Tuesday of this week (March 7), I woke up with just a heavy heart. I cried on and off most of the day. Full of confusion. Why God? Why won't the house sell? How are we going to pay for another child's birth? How are we going to pay for this and that? We only have 1 more month of a mortgage payment, will we foreclose? And my dad isn't even here for advice and encouragement...

Our church is participating in Lent, we are giving up something each week...this week TV. We are only doing it with the kids (AH!)...so anyway, instead of the 30 minutes of TV they get a night, we are doing extended pray time. We prayed for the house in Longview to sell. And we prayed for the person sitting next to us. Ya'll, it has been so sweet. And really helped my ridiculous funk. I listened to my babies pray that God will send a buyer...how innocent they are and how much they believed with full faith.

Only 30 minutes after our prayer time Tuesday, my phone rings...Its our realtor! She said "the house has been showing like crazy, and I think we are going to get an offer tomorrow!"

Our hearts just exploded. Then we got cautious. But still. Hope.

The next day...realtor calls..We got an offer! MORE than we were asking for. And closing the end of March. ARE YOU KIDDING??!???! 

Don't you see how wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Does this mean nothing to you? Can't you see that his kindness is intended to turn you from your sin?  Romans 2:4

The next day, I spent a good amount of time crying again. But this time it was different. I was weeping out of repentance. My heart...was so full of doubt, anger, disobedience...and God STILL provided. And provided above our wildest dreams.

We know it could still fall through. Of course our prayers are that it won't. And this will be the end of this stressful journey. The lessons we have learned, and the amount my faith has grown cannot be replaced. 

I guess I wrote this for me as a remembrance. And a journal. And an encouragement to you. Wherever you are in a hard situation, just know that He is faithful. Even when it isn't in our timing. His timing is ALWAYS right. And better than ours. AND He is working for your good! 

This is a verse I claimed a lot during this season, "And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them."   Romans 8:28



Tuesday, February 28, 2017

20 weeks!!!


20 WEEKS! We made it half way!!! WHOOP WHOOP!

Pregnancy Highlights: 

Size of baby: a banana? Thats never made sense to me. I think they mean the length?

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Well friends, I weighed about 2 weeks ago and had gained 5 pounds so this is the part that I stop weighing.

Maternity Clothes: Yes. and I love them.

Gender: BOY! Powell Allen Nehls 

Movement: Yes! VERY VERY low! 

Sleep: Starting to have a little pregnancy insomnia. 

What I miss: Breathing normal, sleeping on my stomach  

Cravings: Food. Ha! Strawberry Poptarts are up there. 

Symptoms:

Heartburn. All day erryday. So annoying. This baby better be covered in hair!

Best Moment this week
Well I havent blogged in 3 weeks...so since then...
          • When I ask Leslie where baby brother is she points to my tummy
          • I have been feeling him more and more
          • Baby boy clothes!!! AHHHH!!!
          • Making plans for nursery/room decorations
          • Getting excited about another baby! (and alot of nervousness!)

NOT So Best Moment this week:

We still havent sold the Longview house. And have only had three showings in a month. This has been a big disappointment for us. And honestly, we are confused. We are having a hard time seeing God's hand in it all. We know we made the right decision to move here in faith so we pray even harder in faith that God will sell the house quickly. 

Thursday, February 9, 2017

17 weeks and Gender Reveal!


Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along: 17 weeks (I was 16w5d in the picture)

Size of baby: 8 oz at the ultrasound...my app says size of a white onion

Total Weight Gain/Loss:  Gained 1 lb according to my doc. Gained none according to my scale...im going with mine! 

Maternity Clothes: Shirts yes. Some pants

Gender: BOY! Powell Allen Nehls (Powell is the last name of my great grandparents, my dad's middle name as well as Luke's and Hudson's!)

Movement: A few times!

Sleep: Been pretty good!

What I miss: Nothing really. Maybe not having heart burn.  

Cravings: Mexican! Especially pink house dressing. 

Symptoms:

I still get nauseous here and there. Mostly at night when I lay down. And heartburn. 😒

Best Moment this week

Honestly these past few weeks have really sucked. Highlights have been people bringing meals and loving on us. Gods grace, comfort and peace. 

Seeing baby and finding out he is a he! 

NOT So Best Moment this week:

Since I blogged last of course losing dad. Then our renter in the Longview house moved out. Then we got some bad news about finances. But God. 😊 We know He is working for our God and will work things out. 


Here are some pictures from our anatomy scan:



For documentation sake- so we went to the ultrasound that baby was not being cooperative! He is VERY low and was breech at the time. He wouldn't move his legs for anything! After probably 30 minutes of trying, I went to see the doctor/drank a coke and went back to the ultrasound. Probably after 20 minutes, she finally found it. (I did not look!)... Mom looked but didnt know what she was looking at, lol!  The sonogram tech texted my friend making the cupcakes and I had to ask the receptionist to delete the text so I wouldnt look! It was all exciting! 

My mom, brothers and their families came over (Leighton made yummy gumbo), and we let the kids reveal the gender by biting in to the cupcake with blue or pink in the middle. You can watch it here. And of course it was BLUE!

Yall I was SURE it was a girl. Because of my pregnancy symptoms. The only thing that made doubt it was the heart rate was lower than it was with my girls. I CANT BELIEVE IM HAVING ANOTHER BOY! Excited and terrified would be the words to describe my feelings! HA! Thankful God makes those decisions and not man!